Friday, August 31, 2007

Need more of this

One evening this week, I took the little girls to the park with Mary Poppins. MWH met us over there after work and MP went home. It was a fun evening. We played for a little over an hour and then went home. When we got home, our neighbors were playing outside. The kids played and the adults chatted. It was fun in a low-key sort of way. We like our next-door neighbors. They're a little younger than us, but not too much. They have kids (almost 3 and almost 1). It works.

It was fun being outside around dusk on a late summer evening. It felt like we were in a less crazy and stressful era. I liked it. We ate dinner late, and the girls got to bed a little late, but it was fun.




Tonight, I picked up the girls early and MWH left work a little early. We went to the library fountains and let the girls play. I ended up stripping T (2) down to her diaper and letting her run around like that....(I don't normally let the girls run around in just diapers, but we were going out to dinner and she would have been completely soaked if I hadn't have done that). (Note to self, pack a change of clothes for all the girls in my car!) N (5.5) and K (3) did an okay job of staying dry.

At dinner, the little girls were pretty good. MWH and I got to eat and not chase them. It was a good night. I like the fact that I had two low-stress nights this week. I need more of this in my life. This is why I'm making the transitions that I'm making. I shouldn't be as stressed as I am. It's not good for me. It's not good for the little girls. It's not necessary.

The tion post

Introspection, reflection and transition--I need a moment...

I'm finally less busy than I am used to being. I'm trying not to be stressed... Perhaps I'm still stressed because I'm trying so hard not to be stressed. Usually, I cope with stressful things by throwing myself into projects so I don't notice that I'm stressed, but I'm trying to make life a little less crazy, so that strategy won't work here.

Here I am in transition to a less busy state. Transitions are hard. Change is hard. Identity transformations are really hard. I know all of this. It helps a little to understand why it's hard and that it's supposed to be, but it still sucks to live through it. It's nothing horrible, and I know a lot of people have a lot more going on in there lives and a lot of not positive things, but this is where I am... Here's my moment...

So, my big work decision that I alluded to here is that I am not going to stress about work any more. I only have a handful of projects that I kind of like, and none that I love. I've been saying no to things I don't love. I have not sought out anything that I would not just LOVE to work on. This is huge for me. I feel like I'm slacking off, but it is slacking by design. It's hard for me to slack.

My long-term plan is to keep working as long as it's entertaining and not draining, and at some point I'll probably have to move from my salaried position to an hourly position, but that's okay. (I will have to move to an hourly position when my vacation runs out. I've been using up vacation-time as I've been saying no to things). I have to keep reminding myself that my salary doesn't pay the bills around here. It's actually hard to say whether I help the bottom line or hurt it. We definitely want me to keep working because 1) it's important to me, 2) I'm good at what I do, 3) I do things I think are imporant and 4) someday the 3 little girls will be less little, and I'll have more time to work.

MWH is completely supportive of me. In fact, he's so supportive that as I write how supportive he is, I have tears welling up in my eyes. I am truly lucky in how much he wants me to be happy.

I haven't been happy with work for the last year, and maybe longer. (Obviously, I've had good moments and times at work in the last year, but it's not been consistent.) I started teaching at [local university] because I wasn't happy at work. When I started at the University, I knew it was a step to help me figure out what I wanted to do with my life. It's helped me a little.

It's really hard because where I work is a great place, but it's very innovative and not innovative in a way I think it should be. Wow... I wrote that post 1 year ago..... I am really sad that I'm not happy with where I work, but they have us work on so many different things that it is draining our life force. I've spoken with so many people where I work who are overwhlemed and not happy. Something's gotta give.

For me, what's going to give is that I'm changing my strategy. I feel a little like I'm bailing on work, by deciding to most likely be hourly, and that's part of what makes me sad. I'm not bailing though... I'm still going to work there, but I'm going to put my family and me first. I'm even putting teaching above my other work. That too is scary. Teaching is new. But I do love it. But it's new and scary.

There's one project at work that I could do and would be something I really want to do, but it will be new and different and I have to figure out how to make it happen. So what do you think? I think,I'm in transition. I have no doubt that I'll like where I end up, but at the moment, I'm trying to get there and that's the hard part and I'm overwhelmed.

I think I need an iced mocha.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Good stuff, Maynard*

Scene
Our bedroom around 1 am last night
Me working away on the computer, not tired at all--in fact, kind of perky.
MWH exhausted, laying in bed.

him: So, how many cups of coffee did you have today?
me: hysterical laughter
him: That many, huh?


I only had 2 cups, but I usually don't drink two full cups. I felt great. I've only had one cup of coffee today and I don't feel as good. I need to balance feeling great with being able to sleep though.


*Yea, I changed the title. Sorry if I was annoying on the blog readers.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

This week...

It's been a crazy week. (Pull-up a chair!)

My class started Monday. Monday was overwhelming for EVERYONE involved. It didn't go terribly, but why is the start of anything so hard? Oh, yea, change is hard. I study the process of change (sometimes, but not for a few years) so, duh!

N started kindergarten last Thursday and we're still adjusting to pick-ups and drop-offs. I only almost drove to where the preschool was once (heh). (I'm kind of an auto-pilot person sometimes.) I think N is doing well, but she's bored in school. Her teacher caught me today as I was picking N up and she asked if I was still planning to volunteer in the classroom. I am indeed! Her teacher told me that N says she's bored sometimes. I'm not surprised. Her preschool was phenomenal and they kept the kids hopping. I diplomatically said this to the teacher. (I told her that N had done kindergarten curriculum all last year in pre-K at the pre-K she went to.)

Today was K's first ballet class for the fall. A new teacher. I had been excited about the new teacher, but now, not so much. I'm invoking my own, "give something 3-4 tries" before you give up on it rule. If I'm still unhappy in about a month, expect a ranting post!

What else...

Mary Poppins is freaking out a bit about all the change. It's much better today than it was on Monday. Monday wasn't pretty. That's all I'm saying. If you want more info, send me an email.

My Mom had surgery yesterday and she's doing fine. A wire had slipped on her pacemaker and had come loose. They re-attached it. Who knew that could happen?

Back to my class. I think most of my students are freaking out. The class is going to be challenging. It's a difficult subject. I'm being very up front and honest with them about my expectations. I'm also going to give them a lot of support, but I'm not teaching in a traditional manner. I think I'm doing things that will help my students more in the long term and make them more successful in understanding the subject and applying it even. I'm not sure how I would have felt about having me and my methods when I was an undergraduate, but I think I would have liked me and my methods after I got over the initial shock. I'm asking my students to give me 3-4 class periods before they freak out.

One of my students is going to be challenging. She's a bit, um, inflexible. I'm a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants person. I usually can do things pretty well, so this works for me. I plan when I need to. I planned on this class for about 2 months, but still, I lack some details. To me, some things have to be emergent. It drives people who want a plan crazy. I need my students to trust that I will make sure they succeed if they work hard, and if they collaborate in our class. This is going to be hard for this one student, I can tell.



N (5.5) is telling K (3) about a story they read in kindergarten today. I've gotten lost along the way, but I'm multi-tasking and making dinner for 3 little girls. K is listening closely and asking questions. It's very sweet.

The little girls are eating a weird dinner... one of the items is our "fruit smoothy" with a few peas thrown in. I feel so good when K eats peas!

Did I tell you that T (2) knows how to get her own cup of ice water from the refrigerator???

Tomorrow is T's 2 year doctor's check-up too.

I think that's it for now.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Note to self...

Change in schedules are terrible.

Monday, August 27, 2007

Clothes, Food, Elmo and Reading

Hey, look, again, I'm not complaining about K's (3) eating habits. She ate about 12 peas tonight! I'm getting her to eat 3 peas a night (because she's three) on a regular basis. Woo-hoo!

We got some new duck-shaped cheddar crackers... K called them "quackers." MWH and I both laughed.

K LOVES clothes. When N outgrows something, I put it in K's closet and K gets so excited. Even if K doesn't see me put it in her closet, she INSTANTLY spots it as new to her! Tonight, she helped MWH fold their (little girl) clothes. She spied a new shirt of N's (just acquired for school) and she said it was hers. K put it on and came upstairs to show me. N got very upset. A glimpse of the future, eh? K told N it was going to be too tight for her (N) because it fit her (K) perfectly. (Too many hers around here, huh?)

T (2) still loves Elmo. She's loved him for a while. You can read about the Love Affair here. She has a big Elmo that goes in the bathtub... She LOVES him. She also loves to wear Elmo diapers. The kind of diapers we buy have all of the Sesame Street characters on them... a few Big Birds, a few Cookie Monters, Ernies, Elmos, etc. T will go through the package of diapers and pull all the Elmos out. It's pretty funny.

Tonight, N (5.5) was teaching K to read. N loves to be a teacher. N had the flashcards out and was going through them with K. It was very very sweet. K is probably going to be reading fairly soon. She has great phonological awareness and a good grasp on phonics too. (K sounds out simple words sometimes.)

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Why?

If you know me, you know that I love Macs. I loathe M$. Loathe isn't really strong enough of a word, but I'll just stop there.

I have a project at work that requires me to use a PC. I don't like this project. I really don't like using the PC. I just restarted it... Can someone explain to me why it says on the start-up screen,


Insert card or press Ctrl-Alt-Delete to begin.

Requiring this key combination at startup helps keep your computer secure. For more information, click Help.


How does this make my computer secure? Who is this keeping from the computer?

I'm thinking it only helps keep illiterate people off the PC. Good grief, I don't like PCs. They make me grumpy.

Notes from the park...

T (2!) was playing in the sandbox and another Mom and I were talking. The other Mom said, "Her curls are just adorable. It looks like you spend hours on them." After I stopped myself from laughing, I just said, "They are natural." I was accused of spending hours on them the other day too. Yes, her curls are cute, but like I have time??? Obviously these other Moms don't read my blog. I don't even have time to do anything to my own hair.

T climbed up on a play structure and said, "I Big! I GIANT!" I didn't even know she knew that word.

K fell down and scraped her elbow. She was bleeding a little. She was very worried about it. I gave her a kleenex and she applied pressure the whole way home (completely unnecessarily). We went and cleaned it up and then she put the band-aid on all by herself. Pretty impressive for a 3-year-old.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Working away...

Look! I'm working on my class. It starts on Monday. I still feel like I'm in good shape and so far behind simultaneously!

The little girls must be getting easier. Today, MWH felt a little funny, so I let him rest while I took all three by myself to the library and to the fountains. We all made it home. I was impressed. This is NOT something I would have attempted last year. I've had several experiences recently that tell me that it must be getting easier. It's still crazy, but maybe it's do-able.

Someday I need to write about the decisions I've made about work.... I will... It's on my list. Back to class preparations.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Quotes (again!)

K (3) bumped her lip on a book. It hurt. She wondered if it was bleeding. I said no. She said, "Good, if you put a bandaid over my mouth, I wouldn't be able to talk."

Tonight, we were outside playing. She was pretending the trike was a brand new trike. She said, "Look T! It's all red, shiny and pedal-y!" There's a little bit of Buffy in all of us.

Romantic

I don't blog about MWH very often because I would make you all gag from the love... He's such a wonderful guy. Part of what makes him so wonderful is that he's very responsible. Much more responsible than me. Believe it or not, responsibility can be very romantic.

This morning, MWH told me I should buy more tea at the coffee store. Note, he doesn't drink tea, but he often makes tea for me in the morning (see, he's wonderful!). By the time I was ready to go, I had forgotten that I needed tea, but when I got my coffee cup to take with me, I noticed he'd put a reminder on it. He taped an empty tea bag to it. I would have forgotten if he hadn't have done that. It was very sweet, romantic, and wonderful of him. I smiled all day and I got home with more tea.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

emotions...

This week has been a little emotional. My baby turned two and my oldest is going to kindergarten. It's a little too much for even me.

I'm NOT a cry-er... I'm NOT that emotional. I pride myself on my Vulcan-like side. I'm going to do my darndest to NOT cry during the drop-off tomorrow.

I never thought I'd be thinking I might cry at kindergarten drop-off.

Whew....

I think I might be done with my syllabus for my class. I did a LOT of thinking about what I wanted to occur in the class. I hope I've structured it so I can make the things I want happen. I'm sure you'll get to hear more about the class as it unfolds.

Pure Documentation....

MWH took some time off this week. He rented a dumpster (a HUGE one). He cleaned out the garage... Since we moved to our house, we could only fit one car in the garage. Now, our two-car garage is holding two cars and we've gotten rid of a lot of junk! The garage looks great. It's organized. There are bins and shelves! Go MWH! It's been fun having a house husband, (but unfortunately, I have been too busy this week to take full advantage of it).

cool or geek?

I'm not sure if my cool, nerd, or geek points just went up... I made the world a slightly better place by a few pixels.... I edited the Wikipedia!

What do you think? Cool, nerd or geek?

Monday, August 20, 2007

Happy Blogoversary to me...

Can you believe it??? Two years... Me... Blogging... Can I just say I love it here? I love blogging! I love all of you who read! Who knew?! I would have never guessed.

For me, blogging is such good therapy. It also is necessary to help me remember all the details of my life that otherwise would be gone. I love this time with the little girls. But it's crazy. Most of the time, I love it because they are so cute and it's crazy in a good way. Sometimes, I need to remember the challenges that go along with 3 little girls. It's a little odd to put things out on the web for all to read, but I'm okay with it now. I don't write EVERYTHING. I've learned what I'm comfortable writing and not. I sometimes try to abstract the gist of the experience and not record the details. I sometimes write a post and don't publish it. (I sure hope Google isn't saving them in a database that's easy to hack!) I sometimes start to write a post, realize that I'm annoying even myself with the whining, and I stop. I then work to let go of the stress. It's all good.

I don't have a lot of new insight from myblogoversary post last year... (go read if you haven't!) I do want to revisit what I said at the end though...
From last year...

So will I make it to blogoversary two? Make a bet as to how many posts you think I'll make in the next year... Will I do more than 753 or fewer? Bets taken now. Winners announced 8/20/2007.


Here are the stats...
1684 posts total (many unpublished....) Last year the total unpulished was 753 (in August), in the last year, I created 931 more posts.

Here are the published posts stats

375 for this year (2007)
622 for last year (all of 2006)
392 for last year through August 2006
89 for 2005 (Aug-Dec)

I'm actually blogging a little more than last year (Aug '05 - Aug '06) I believe.... I'm very consistent... We'll see what next year brings though because I started a new family blog. It's getting some of the "cute" little girl stories that would normally go here. 41 so far since June, so believe in total, I'm blogging as much (a little more actually), but not in one place. If you want to see the other blog, email me (virtual_jk theatsign yahoo dot com) and let me know. I am restricting access to it, but it's not private, but I am not posting the URL here.

If you commented last year on my blogoversary post, please comment again this year and let me know if you're still reading. (Some of you I know.)

If you didn't comment last year, but you want to de-lurk this year and comment, it would make my day! Heck, it would make my week!!!!!! Give me some commenty-love! (You can even be anonymous!) Tell me about you, why you read, and all that good stuff. I've made some wonderful new friends here. They are over there in my right hand column. Thank you all. XOXOXO or group hug... whichever you prefer.

I feel so far behind schedule.... I have T's birthday to document, how wonderful she is, the toe-ring K has started wearing, N starting kindergarten, my class, my BIG DECISION about work, my friend from abroad being here visiting, my new pedicure (Dutch Tulips OPI), ..... Lots!

Happy Blogoversary to me!

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Big Weekend

It's a little crazy (in a good way) this weekend. If I don't get a chance to post before Monday, don't worry about me! Chances are good that I'm off having fun. I'll be back as soon as I can and hopefully with time to tell you wonderful stories! If you want to know some of what we're up to this weekend, read the post from one year ago today. Archives are on the right side at the bottom.

Now on my wish list...

I just found a recommendation for this book, Lives of a Cell by Lewis Thomas (Dean of Yale Medical School and other impressive things). Apparently, in one of the essays, titled "Your Very Good Health," he says that "The great secret... is that most things [health problems] get better by themselves."

I'm really interested in reading this book. When I get time to read it, I'll have more fodder for discussing the medicalization of our society. This is something I want to think more about, but NEVER have time. Sigh.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Still...

I got an email about kitten adoption.... I'm a sucker for no-kill animal shelters and they know it. I'm on several mailing lists... I usually ignore emails because, if I don't, I quickly decide we need 50 more cats (or dogs, or whatever animal they feature).

Today, for some reason, I followed the link in the email.

Big Mistake.

I ended up in tears.

I still miss my boy.

It's now been 2.5 years since I got to pet his soft fur. The other day, I was looking at his pictures. I took pictures a week before he did and the morning of his death. I finally am realizing that I waited until pretty much the inevitable end was nigh. He didn't look so good the morning of his death. Getting the vet to come and help him pass peacefully was really really hard, but it was done at the right time. He would have suffered a lot more if I hadn't. He was suffering from congestive heart failure and his death, most likely, would not have been peaceful.

He was the best cat for me. He and I were lucky to have found each other.

Read more about him... (He has a whole website and if you want to see it, email me.)

Nail Polish

Miss K (3) seems to be getting a lot of airtime in the blog right now. Could it be because she's in a "phase?" I'm just not sure if her phase is motivated by some physical changes (e.g., brain development--it can be painful to myelinate) or "just behavioral."

This summer, she did a lot. She went to preschool. She started ballet. She took swim lessons. She got a taste of life as a BIG GIRL. She liked it. Now, as we wait for preschool to start again, she's hanging out with Mary Poppins more. She's really bored at Mary Poppins's house. When kids (myself included) get bored, they do things that aren't necessarily good choices. For K this involves screaming, kicking and hitting. (For me, it involves saying yes to projects that I shouldn't say yes to because I don't actually have ANY EXTRA TIME.)

When N (now 5.5) was three, she was difficult. I didn't have this blog yet, and I was pregnant with T, and it was HARD. Capital HARD hard. N didn't like her nanny at the time. It wasn't Mary Poppins. It was NannyT. Each night, N would tell me how much she didn't like NannyT and I would feel terrible. Each morning N would say how much she didn't want NannyT to come. It wasn't good.

That's how it is now with K.

[Begin tangent]
A nanny always sounds great, but it's work to have a nanny. I know it's work to be a nanny too. I'm not denying that. A nanny becomes part of the family, yet you pay her (him). A nanny has to be part of the family, but also understand there are parameters. A nanny has to maintain her own boundaries without feeling too rigid and closed off. It's quite a balance. I've not been a nanny, but I was a close assistant to one of my professors. Some of my duties included taking care of her children when she needed help and statistical analyses of her data. Talk about different tasks!

I used to get frantic calls from her late at night or early in the morning. It was hard. I never knew if she was calling to talk about an analysis or if I could watch her kids because her nanny was sick. Unfortunately, she didn't observe any boundaries I tried to establish on our relationship. She would strongly enforce the ones she set. It was hard.

I try to be fair. I try to see things from our nanny's point of view. Because of my experience with ProfJ, I try to make sure I'm not crossing boundaries...

[End tangent]

So that's some of what I'm thinking about today. There are only 11 more nanny days until K starts preschool. I'm counting down! It's going to be a long 11 days...


Oh, how does this relate to Nail Polish you ask? Well, K LOVES nail polish. Before kids, and even after, untiil K was about 2.5, I SWORE I wouldn't let my little girls run around with toe nail polish on. I myself love a good pedicure, but I didn't think they needed to wear nail polish until they were at least 10! Heh. Never say never.

I present Exhibit A ... K's toes (and sweet little feet...).

Last night, K upset Mary Poppins. Mary Poppins left very upset. It may not sound like a punishment, but last night, because of this, I removed K's toe nail polish. She cried and cried. I think it was a good punishment. I don't like to "punish" but rewards for positive behavior don't seem to be enough.

I had explained to K, as I had painted her toe nails yesterday morning (less than 12 hours before I had to remove it), if she wasn't nice, she didn't get to keep the toe nail polish. Last night, because of her actions, she lost the toe nail polish. We'll see how effective that consequence was. She has to get stickers at Mary Poppins's house today and tomorrow to get her toe nail polish back.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Don't panic....

Really good advice.

Topic One
I'm trying not to panic about how much work I have to do to get prepared for this class. I waffle back and forth between thinking I'm in good shape and then thinking there's NO WAY I will ever get everything done before the class starts. I need to make sure I'm doing things thoughtfully and that I'm not doing too many new things. I'm trying. I like to do new things, but I need to make sure there aren't too many new things... It's a tough thing to balance.


Topic Two
I have to deal with closing a retirement account that was created for me when I was in grad school. I thought it was closed already... It wasn't... Now MWH and I have to figure out some tax stuff... SIGH.

I shouldn't complain because it's my money they want to give me, but I never wanted the account in the first place. The University made me take it. Back when I was a graduate student, I would have preferred having the cash instead of having some of my money put in a retirement account for me. Now, given that I have NO time, nor interest in figuring out all the tax stuff, I really wish they could have just given the cash to me back then.

Topic Three
I'm still suffering from an identity crisis. It's mostly better. I have accepted that I'm a mere mortal and that I need to sleep. I have a lot to write about this topic (mere mortal status and the changes I'm making to make things better for our family), but no time to do it right now.

Topic Four
I should go work out since I haven't done a good work out since August 1. Last week, I was sick. This week, I am much better! Yippee. My energy is pretty much back! Thank goodness! I need it!

A funny thing though... MWH liked my energy last week. I thought I was so dragging.... He thought I seemed, well, normal. I guess I am a little, um, energetic. I'm working on taking it down a notch... see Topic Three.


Topic Five
K (3).... She's "bored" at the nanny's house. Thank goodness I decided to put her in preschool 5 days a week. I have no doubt she's bored. She's very smart and she LOVES to get out and do exciting! things! She ALWAYS has. Ever since she was really little. You could tell she loved to go places. At the nanny's house, they don't get out... They literally stay there all afternoon. For N, this is great. For T, she likes it. For K, it's torture. Only 3 more weeks until she starts preschool. Only 9 more days until N (5.5) starts kindergarten.


Topic Six
I want to go on record saying, I'm NOT actually complaining about any of this stuff. These things are not that bad. I'm just feeling overwhelmed and I want to record my overwhelmed status for my own sake so I can remember. (Not sure why, but I do.)

'ed

K (3) is firmly in the "adding ed" to the end of every past tense verb. It's a very regular rule for her.... She watcheded, runded, jumpded, telded (told), etc. According to Kuczaj (1978), it's not until age 7 that kids really know the correct past tense form.

I'm recording this because if I don't record it here, I'll forget when it happened.

N (5.5) never went through this particular phase. Her biggest error, and it was cute, was saying "befrom" instead of "because." Example: I want some ice cream befrom I like it. (I need to look up in my other journal when this ended.)

I just remembered another N error... For the LONGEST time she couldn't say, Please may I have some XXXX? She'd say Please may-I-can-I have some XXXX? may-I-can-I was one word. It was hilarious!



References
Kuczaj, S.A., (1978). Why do children fail to overregularize the progressive inflection? Journal of Child Language, 5, 167-171.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Literally...

We had a day at the beach today--literally and figuratively. MWH and I took vacation days both Friday and today. On Friday, he and I went to see Harry Potter #5 with some good friends. That was fun. (It HAD to have been fun. It took about 40 emails to arrange for the 8 friends to find a common day. It was definitely worth all the emails!)

Today, we went to the beach. It's about an hour from our house to the beach. Last summer, because of everything going on, we never made it to the beach. It was kind of pathetic, and I was sad, but the little girls were so young... It was hard to juggle naps and etc. (Oh yea, and that remodeling of the house thing!) This year, the 3 little girls were older and the nap schedule is much easier. I'm so glad we went. They were amazingly good so it was fun! K (3) and N (5.5) played with me in the ocean and T (almost 2) played in the sand with MWH. T touched the water and decided she didn't like it. I was surprised--in the swimming pool, she's a fish! The waves seemed to scare her and she wasn't. going. in. the. water!

I was probably just as surprised that K wanted to play in the splashy waves as I was that T didn't. K tends to get scared easily, but she went in the water for about an hour. When N, K and I were in the ocean holding hands, I wanted to capture the memory and exist on it. We were running and laughing. It was amazingly simple and delightful. They are so young and sweet.






On another note, I'm a big fan of sun protective swimwear. We got our suits here. (Yea, I'm doing a little ad for them. I really liked them.) Today was a really sunny day at the beach. I decided we needed a Sun Tent. I just found this and I think I want it! I'm just not into roasting in the sun at all. I was slathered in sunscreen, but I feel I still got some sun. If I wasn't in the water, I was whining to MWH about how sunny it was. I like overcast days at the beach... Yea, I'm weird.

Hope you all had a fun Monday!

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Perspective....

Miss K (3) likes to give her stuffed animals a voice and speak their thoughts for them. Not so unusual. Many kids her age do this. What I think is a little different, and perhaps insightful, is when a stuffed animal is speaking, it will address me by my first name J____, but it will not call me Mommy. K will call me Mommy, but not the stuffed animal. Heh. It makes sense.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

More about High Maintenance...

Harry Burns: There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance.
Sally Albright: Which one am I?
Harry Burns: You're the worst kind. You're high maintenance but you think you're low maintenance.

See this site for more great Harry Met Sally quotes.

MWH decided that K is someone who thinks she gets enough sleep but doesn't.

And then she went all "HM*" on me...

That's what MWH said tonight about K (3).

We didn't "make" her nap today. Mistake. I didn't make her nap on Thursday and it wasn't too bad, it wasn't great, but I've seen a lot worse. She did nap yesterday. She started today off really well, and then she went all HM on us. Really, truly HM. She started losing it around 6 pm. Guess who gets a nap tomorrow?



*HM=high maintenance

More coffee, please!

I've been tired, oh so tired, all week. Really, really tired. This little sinus thing is no fun!

I don't even sound/look sick, but I have no energy. I do have enough nose symptoms to know it is sinus. For the most part, I'm getting better, but am still zapped. MWH said I should quantify how sick I am by how much extra coffee I need. Heh. I think an extra 32 ounces of coffee would put me up to my normal energy level.

Yea, I'm tired.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Hey check it out...

There's a poll in the right hand column... Play along! I'd love to know more about you all!

Excuses, excuses...

I'm having a hard time this week because

1) gymnastics camp (see this entry for my complaints)

2) my throat is sore and my sinuses have been bothering me.

Reason #2 has a bit of a story behind it. It all started Saturday... I was eating tortilla chips with melted cheese... I accidentally swallowed a bite of the chips without chewing all the way. When it happened, I knew that my throat was going to hurt. It seemed a little like the scratch was infected on Monday morning. Tuesday I felt better, but my sinuses seemed a little funny. Wednesday my sinuses were killing me. Today, my sinuses feel a lot better, but I still feel really tired and my throat hurts. If I'm not a lot better tomorrow I'm going to go to the doctor.

The lesson here children is to chew your food well.

I'm going to go rest now.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

What would you do? (Edited)

Miss K (3) has taken a nap every day since Saturday when she LOST it ... Yesterday she didn't fight taking a nap at all. She slept for 1.5 - 2 hours. She went to bed at approximately 9:45, but didn't fall asleep until after 11 pm. She got up at 9 am. (10 hours of sleep.)

She seems to need about 12 hours of sleep a day total. If she doesn't take a nap, she often sleeps 11 hours at night and then gets really tired and cranky after a few days, because she's missing an hour of sleep she needs a day. If she naps, she will go to bed later. It's not that big of a deal because 1) I'm always up late and 2) if K keeps N (5.5) up, N will usually sleep in and make-up for the late night. N needs 10-11 hours. If K and N stay up, they usually stay in their room and talk, play, and giggle. Sister bonding time. T (almost 2) is in a different room and sleeps.

What should I do?

a) Nothing... Have K nap and go to bed late (the evenings are a little more pleasant)
b) Nap every other day
c) Nap for a shorter period of time (me wake her after about an hour)
d) Other Please explain in the comments

Any one else have experience with a kid who didn't need to sleep? If you did a, b or c, how did that work for you?

I feel I should add a little more about our sleep parameters...

I don't want K to get up earlier. That's a big thing. MWH and I just don't do mornings. Getting out of bed before 8 am on a regular basis is very very painful. (He and I both went to school and worked to find jobs that don't require on early. Seriously. We both chose careers that had flexible hours because of our dislike of mornings.) N hopefully will be in afternoon kindergarten and then in first grade, it doesn't start until 9 am. I'm thinking we'll be able to sleep until 8 and just hurry in the morning!

Back to the K situation though.... Miss K can't nap in the afternoons too early because soon she'll be in preschool from 12:30-3:30 and we don't get home until 4 ish. She's also usually not tired at 1 or so because she gets up around 9.

It works for us and our family to be on this schedule. I don't think K would sleep more hours if she went to bed earlier. I love the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, and pretty much everything he says EXCEPT the part about get the kids to bed earlier. Um, no. If I put K to bed at 8 pm she'd probably wake up at 7 am. If I put her to bed at 9:30 and she falls asleep at 10 and gets up at 8:30-9 (or sometimes later!) then that works for me! I think Marc Weissbluth (author) is missing understanding that some people just AREN'T wired to get up in the morning. MWH and I are not made for mornings.


One other thing....My hope is that as we get into a routine this fall with K in preschool and the same schedule everyday, it will probably help her a lot. Right now, we're on break from preschool and things are a little wacky schedule-wise.

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

At the moment

I remember reading other people's blogs and seeing them say they were having a hard time writing... I didn't understand it, but now I do. That's where I am--having a hard time writing. I can easily write about little things going on, but about the bigger picture, I'm having a hard time.

I'm struggling with not wanting to work so much, but also not wanting to not work. It's all I'm thinking about, and what I want to write about.... But I don't want to write about it because I don't want to whine a lot and bore you all. It shouldn't be that hard of a decision, but it is. Maybe I'll write about it to sort it out in my mind... I've been sorting and sorting since March, but haven't decided what to do.

On another note
This week, I enrolled K (3) and N (5.5) in a gymnastics camp. They go for 3 hours each day. Three hours of bouncing and tumbling goodness. They LOVED yesterday, but I didn't. The camp was not organized and I refused to leave them there by themselves. I didn't get ANYTHING done yesterday. I wasn't happy. I enrolled them in camp so I could work while they had fun. I complained quite a bit to the director yesterday and he promised it would be better today. So far it is a bit better, but I'm not sure if I want to leave or not.

I have my iPhone, my crackberry and my laptop and even access to a free wireless network so I theoretically can work. I'm not comfortable -- I'm sitting on an aluminum bench. The ergonomics person would have a cow if she saw me. Tomorrow, MWH will come and sit with the girls and decide whether he's thinks it's safe to leave them or not. I'm almost good with leaving, but not quite.

It probably doesn't help that Mary Poppins was in a fender-bender with T (almost 2!) yesterday. Everyone is fine, but my fragile Mommy state isn't. Being a Mom requires nerves of steel and I don't seem to have mine right now.

A post about cute little girls coming soon.

Sunday, August 05, 2007

Little T

Miss T (ALMOST 2) is such a sweetie. She's just talking up a storm. Today she told me, "Look, a plane. Plane flying up in the sky, Mommy."

About two seconds later she told me, "Alfred cleans up the floors." I wonder what's the link she has in her little brain between planes and Alfred.

Tonight before bed she nursed and snuggled to sleep. Such a big girl and such a baby. It is getting easier having little girls instead of babies, but how did my last baby grow up so fast?


Edited to add: Um, duh, the link is both planes and Alfred are animate objects. I think T has some of the concept of animate/living and animate/not alive. She won't fully get the concept of living/not living for a while because of plants. Plants are ODD. They are alive, but they don't move. This concept doesn't typically get mastered until preschool-ish/early elementary. (Trust me, I'm a professional. See here for a lesson plan with young elementary students.)

intense conversation...

Most weekend mornings I run into this couple at the coffee shop. They are about my age plus or minus 5 years (I'm so bad at judging ages!). They are very definitely a couple. They don't (appear to) have children. They seem very into each other, but every time I see them sipping their lattes, they appear to be having a VERY INTENSE conversation. The kind a couple has when making up from a fight or when something bad has just happened.

It's kind of odd. I feel all tense around them. I always wonder what they are discussing. They never laugh. They never look relaxed. They speak softly and I can never overhear anything. I hope they are okay. I think life is too short to be that serious.

Naps

Yesterday, K (3) slept for almost 3 hours. T (almost 2) did too! Tired girls. It's just so interesting how T will go for her nap with very little complaining and K will fight it every blink of the way. N (5.5) and T are a lot alike. N would sleep when she was tired. She still does.

I was worried after the 3-hour nap that K would never go to bed, but thankfully she went to bed pretty well last. I know that kids who sleep better in the day sleep better at night (and vice versa), the problem is that K just doesn't want to sleep. She is very willful. She fights and fights the sleep thing.

Anyway, I guess we're back to the task of trying to get K to nap most days. She needs them.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Where'd I put that manual?

Miss K (3) is still asleep. She feel asleep at 5:29 pm... After screaming for 25 minutes while I drove around. Do I wake her or do I let her sleep? She's so tired. MWH and I think we need to let her sleep, but we're both a little scared of how late she might be up tonight. I guess that's why there are videos, eh?

Kicking, Screaming, No fun

Miss K (3) needs naps. When she doesn't get one, she is no fun. When she doesn't take one many days in a row, it's not pretty. Today, at 5 pm, MWH put her in the car and I drove. For 25 minutes. She screamed. She kicked. She pounded on the window. She tried to open the door. I was thankful for the childlocks on the backdoors of the car.

Overall, she's a much easier at age 3 than she was at age 2, but she really doesn't like to sleep. She never has. She NEEDS to sleep though.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Planning

I'm trying to plan my schedule for the fall. Here's what it looks like thus far.

M-Th I work a lot... (If only I wasn't teaching...) I do have some flexibility built in each day (can start later on T or Th or end earlier any day if /when needed), but I need to do a lot during the day so I don't have to stay up late at night working. If I can keep most of my work during the days most weeks, I think I'll be a lot happier on the weekends too. We'll see how it goes.

I'm trying to keep Fridays free from work and for the girls. T and K have gymnastics Friday morning... Then K has school. I'd like to volunteer in N's kindergarten classroom on Friday afternoons.

I'm still waffling about whether I should try to take a leave from my job for a few months while I teach this fall. I've heard that it's an option to take up to a 6 month leave. I haven't looked into it yet though to see for sure.

The schedule looks daunting. I keep telling myself not to panic yet... See how it feels and how crazy it is to work and teach. It may not be too bad. Maybe since I'm more prepared for it, and since I've been working hard to plan ahead for my class, it won't be as insane as it was last semester. We'll see.

I've also learned some things this summer. One thing, is to make sure I don't agree to things on tight deadlines. If something HAS to be done by a certain date while I'm still teaching, I should NOT be involved.

There are a lot of projects that don't have tight deadlines so I need to just work on those and not agree to anything short deadline and insane. Even if it sounds like a REALLY FUN short project. (That's always my problem, things sound fun and I say yes! Must practice NO.)

Another thing I've realized, is that my schedule isn't just about me any more... It's about the 3 little girls too. The summer has been kind of crazy... but not as crazy as last summer! (I'm learning slowly!)

I want to spend time with the little girls. I don't want to have to work every night from 10-midnight and in the morning from 7-8:30 am to fit in everything. I don't want to have to call on MWH to pick up the slack when I get insane as often as I did last semester. (He's so amazing. He puts up with my insane schedule! He wants me to be happy.) I'm almost sastisfied with how much time I will get with the little girls, but I would like to work one less day a week. I don't think teaching and working will work out long term. I'm trying to figure out the best solution for everyone involved.

Now I need to go put on Quant-girl Costume. It's almost fitting.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Discuss...Edited

While I'm busy trying to get my Quant-girl (super-hero) costume to fit again, I'd love to hear your thoughts on a topic...

There is no dress code where I work. You can come to work in a suit, or flip-flops. Both are perfectly acceptable. Most people dress in pants, jeans, skirts, sweaters, polo-shirts, etc. Middle of the line. (Confession... I do wear flip-flops to work most days, but they are "nice" flip-flops.) If we're going to client meetings, we dress so that the client is comfortable, but we are still somewhat true to ourselves e.g., if someone never wears a suit, they aren't asked to, but they are asked to look nice.

With that background, which do you think is more acceptable to wear to the office... Very casual outfits, or dressy, but skimpy outfits? What about a strapless dress? What about spaghetti straps? (Edited to clarify, this isn't about me and what I wear to work. I'm firmly in the casual camp. I'll share more after you play along and tell me what you think is appropriate work attire.)

Share your thoughts be they biased or objective, based on Vogue or Glamour (Fashion Dos and Don'ts!).

Play along! It's going to take me a while to get my Quant-girl costume to fit. The last time I wore it was when I was 9 months pregnant with T!