Friday, August 04, 2017

Day off...

I made it to our week off in June and it was good for the head.  And then, work got weird.  I've worked at the same place for a very long time.  After many years of chugging along doing GREAT things, there are changes.

I don't know exactly what I'll be doing in a month or two.  It could be business as usual, or it could be a change.  I'll let you know more as it unfolds.  I think that things will work out and end up being better than they are now for my work, but transitions are hard.  Though I'm super comfortable with ambiguity, I dislike this state that we're in at work.  It's more than ambiguous.  I'm trying not to think about it, but it's obviously not working here.


_____________

On the home front, it's been a good summer.  twoK danced a lot and made a lot of progress.  oNe has ridden horses and helped with summer camp for beginners.  Three-a has tried rock climbing (she loves it).  They all tried parkour.  They all seem to enjoy it.  twoK got out of attending science camp because of dancing, but next year, I need to get her into a science camp -- note to self, sign her up for the one that she wants to attend in JANUARY so we can get the June camp.

Next summer, we have to think about college stuff for oNe.  I can't believe we're here in our journey.  Time flies.  I won't go on about how quickly they grow up; I could, but I'll just say, insert EVERY CLICHE about how quickly kids grow here.

We didn't get as much fun cooking done as I would have liked this summer, but maybe we can make some yummy things this weekend.

Other things: We are firmly in the land of teenagers now.  I think about development and learning a lot (it's my job).  A book I read that I LOVE said if you don't dread the teenage years, you'll have a better experience.  I've never dreaded them, really.  I've had lots of people tell me how difficult they'd be with 3 girls, but I just kind of laughed with them ('cause what can you say?).  I knew they meant well.  I have known this stage of life was coming for a while.  I have been trying to set up conditions that will allow us to thrive. I worked hard early on in life to establish a good relationship with the girls.  I wanted to be their Mom and their friend.  But Mom is first.

It is my job to help them navigate the world and make their place in it.  I want them to be themselves, but I also want to share my values and beliefs with them.  I don't want to constrain them, but I don't want to have kids that are disrespectful or unpleasant.  I am happy that so far, I really like the girls.  We still have a few more years to go in the adolescent experience, and I think it will get harder before it gets easier, but my goal is to keep being there.  In the book I mentioned above, it talks about how during the teen years girls (all teens, really) pull away. That can be hard.  But pulling away is what an adolescent is supposed to do.  I think the trick is to figure out how much pulling away is normal and how much is too far.

This Mom gig is hard. It's fun, rewarding, messy, ugly, and wonderful all at the same time.  oNe is experiencing something right now that she won't talk about.  I am trying to use all my SKILLZ to figure out what the problem is.  I am trying not to pry, to just hang with her a little, but give her space.   Today, we'll watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer (BtVS) and dance for a while and I hope I can learn a little more.

It could be that she's upset that we have to go out of town for an important family event coming up soon and that she's going to miss a slumber party with some dear friends.  It could be that school is starting and summer is ending.  It could be just her brain feeling weird about things 'cause there are a lot of changes. It could be that I can't do anything to help, but it feels like if I'm there, doing stuff that she likes with her it will be better.

One more random thought, I love doing physical activities with my girls.  I think it really helps with bonding.  I dance with oNe and Three-a.  I need to start doing a workout class with twoK.  <-- 12="" a="" and="" are="" be="" bit="" blog="" but="" convos="" cost="" difficult="" doing="" eggs="" for="" get="" gives="" going="" great="" hatch="" have="" he="" helps="" her="" i="" in="" is="" it="" like="" ll="" means="" money="" nbsp="" other="" p="" pokemon="" runs="" s="" she="" situations.="" some="" soon="" spend="" started="" starting="" summer="" talk.="" teenager="" that="" the="" this="" three-a="" time="" to="" together.="" us="" walks="" we="" with="" worth="">
New plan for the day, get the girls to figure out some new cooking things that we can do this weekend in addition to BtVS and dance.

Sorry for the post with so many random thoughts ... Know that another one with more random thoughts is probably coming soon.  

Friday, May 19, 2017

I want a day off

And a day off for my head.  I feel a little like I've been whining about this year; I don't know how much it's been out loud versus in my head, but I've been feeling meh.  Whine, whine, whine.  Nothing specific, but I am overwhelmed.

I am looking forward to the end of school. That will help. twoK's had a tough year in math.  She's in advanced math and she has never loved math.  When they placed her there I was a little concerned but figured we could do it.  Well, we'll survive and limp over the finish line.  We'll make sure she has a good tutor ALL year next year (and the next year and the next or for as long as it takes....)  We have been working with her, but we just got a good tutor and it's making a huge difference.  twoK was resistant, but now she is happy we have the tutor.

twoK is 13 now!  Wow!  She is so smart and witty (even in math, she just doesn't like it).  She's a beautiful dancer and we love our sweet K cat!

oNe and Three-a are good... I need to do a post on what all they are up to, but not today.  Today, I am whining.  That's the purpose of this post.

I totally want a day off... And permission to do NOTHING.  I need to give myself that permission.  After June 3, I can (for a day or two).  And in June, we'll go on a trip to see family and friends so that will be fun.

okay... deep breath... Suck it up for just a little longer.



Sunday, April 30, 2017

Yikes

oNe is old enough to start learning to drive this summer... While this will be helpful, it's so scary!  

She's not super excited to learn to drive, but she rides horses and it will be great for her to be able to drive herself to the stables and home.  It's a drive on the freeway, but the freeway isn't busy most of the time when she goes so it'll be a nice way to learn to drive.  

By next summer, she could be the one to take herself there and back each day for the camp where she wants to help.  (This summer, we'll have to drive her to and from camp.  While it's not out of my way to go there by too much, I wouldn't be driving there at the times she needs to be dropped off and picked up.)

(She will volunteer at the camp this year--who knows if she'll like it, but I am guessing she will.)

Not the most exciting post, but I want to document just how crazy this milestone is... The first kid doing something new is ALWAYS scary and exciting.   Somehow, I think this driving thing will always be scary and exciting, regardless of the kid.  DRIVING....IT'S a huge responsibility!  It's GROWN UP.  

How did we get here?  I guess I'm coming up on the 11th anniversary of this blog.  Happy early blogoversary to me... I'll be shocked if I don't miss it in August.  School will have just started and it will be very busy with a new schedule.  The new school year always kicks me in the bottom, and we'll be rather busy getting ready for a conference at work. 



Thursday, April 27, 2017

Spring Break

Over spring break MWH was better!  He can walk pretty well again!  (Still a little limp but not bad.  He really did a number on his poor foot.)  Given this improvement, we went to Yosemite -- so amazingly beautiful.  California got a ton of rain this year and it was incredibly green.

It was great to have MWH on this trip.  We missed him on our ski trip (see previous post).  It rained one day of our trip.  It was pretty awful, we tried to take a hike, but one girl (Three-a) was cold and completely miserable.  We need to get waterproof hiking boots for 4 of us.  Only oNe has really good hiking boots.  (And this is why Zappos loves me--someone or multiple people always need shoes!)

I'm not going to write much more about this trip because I've documented it in pictures on the "other' blog, but yay!  Yosemite!  I hope we can go back again in the next couple of years.  (Maybe when oNe is a junior, twoK is a freshman, and Three-a is an 8th grader.)



Trips we still need to take with the girls--the problem is we don't like to travel much:

NY
Grand Canyon**
Yellowstone**
DC
Another trip abroad -- Italy, Switzerland, Sweden, Finland, and Costa Rica are all places I really want to take them

Coming up soon we'll go to Universal Studios and see the Harry Potter stuff there!  (Hopefully we can find time over the summer.  It's already so full of things that I'm not sure when.)






Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Ski trip

This year, I took the girls skiing by myself.  As you may remember, MWH broke some bones in his foot. We weren't going to get to go skiing this year because the regular ski trip is a lot of work.  It involves a flight.  A lot of driving and cooking in a condo.  I wasn't up for all that by myself.  But I really wanted the girls to go skiing.

I thought about it and realized we have ski slopes within a fairly easy drive from our house.  I decided that I could take all 3 skiing by myself.  They are older and they are super helpful and super good girls.  I decided it would be a great opportunity to make memories with them.  Since none of us are getting younger, I decided to go for it.

I was super worried about going and driving and skiing with 3.  But we did it  I didn't write up details--wish I had, but better late than never.  I'm trying to remember the details, but they are blurry.  The car we took (rental with 4-wheel drive) was bigger than I have driven in a long time, but I liked it up in the snow!  (I drive an electric car so that wouldn't have worked very well.)  My girls helped me navigate and were helpful and awesome.  They also were good friends and sweet to each other the whole time so that was extra nice.

As I mentioned I was worried about skiing with all 3.  One doesn't love to ski, but she was willing to sit down in the lodge with her phone while we went one morning.  She joined us again in the afternoon.  We only had a couple of falls that were kind of scary.  I skied behind them so I could see them and if they fell I could help them or talk them through getting up.

We skied for a day and 1/2 (should have been two days, but it snowed while we were there and none of us like to ski while it is snowing). They love playing in the snow!  There was a ton of snow!  (The snow was some of the best I've ever seen for skiing.)

On the last morning, the girls weren't really helping me pack up.  I reminded them that I NEEDED help because I was alone.  I went down to move our car and came back and they'd packed up the entire hotel room.  Things were kind of chaotically packed, but it was done.  I was super proud of them.

I am so glad we went. I missed MWH a lot. He's my partner. I am pretty independent, but I like my partner.  But, it was good for the girls to know we girls can do stuff without guys.

One last thing... It was fun sleeping 4 in a room. The girls say I snore. Only on my back and then like a bunny.  Next time though, maybe I will get two rooms.  I will sleep better... they are noisy sleepers too!

Monday, April 24, 2017

Seizure inducing toy

A little boy had a spin-y toy with bright flickering lights on an airplane flight I was on recently. It was flickering in my peripheral visual field. It was almost seizure inducing.  Seriously.  (I am kind of sensitive to lights.)

I get that he's a little kid.  I get that you're trying to keep him quiet on the plane.  However, the flicker was more annoying to me than crying.  I did not say anything to the Mom.  I wouldn't.  I'm just throwing this out there for the universe.


Friday, March 31, 2017

Recording some stuff

ME:  T quit softball this year!!! Shocking! Her Dad and I were sad, but it was her decision. I can tell you more if you want.

Friend:  SHE DID?!?! I'm so surprised! She'lll find something else fast I bet...

Me:  already did... Tumbling... And she went from wanting to be a Computer Scientist to an oncologist for cats.

Friend:  she's got some space for that decision.

Me:  absolutely, but this has been a year o' change. It is so funny to see how *completely* she is giving things up tho... she wants NOTHING to do with either of her previous interests anymore.

A little more context.  Her decision for softball was *before* the season started so we didn't "quit" -- we just didn't sign up. She didn't want to go to CS camp this summer, but wanted to go to roller coaster design camp -- fine with me, I just want to see her doing some STEM.

Saturday, March 04, 2017

Dear Future Self....

I've decided I'm going to archive things here that I'll want to see again in the future ... these things will primarily be related to the 3 little girls... NOW 15, 12 (almost 13) and 11.  Not so little. 



Wednesday, January 25, 2017

His first break...

I am trying to dig my way out of the hole I was thrown into when MWH broke two bones foot...

Did I tell you about that? He broke it on January 3. It's the first bone break for him; well, actually the first 16+ breaks.  He broke two bones MULTIPLE times.  He did super good job on breaking his foot.   He always gives his all.

 It's been 3.5 weeks since the surgery, and he's just starting to be able to be out of bed for more than 15-20 minutes at a time.

He does so much around the house. I have been spending a lot of time keeping up with the work he does in the house. I am tired. He does dishes, trash, laundry*, other cleaning, making girls' lunches (he does the second shift usually while I get ready for the day and he helps me get out of the door in the morning), picking up kids (not really doing this, our nanny has picked up the slack there) bringing in new supplies from the garage, e.g., paper towels).

Yes, I am lucky.  He is awesome. I think we usually do about the same amount of work around the house. I do the first shift of getting girls ready for school, the drop off for both schools, the cooking, planning for the cooking, laundry, organizing for the week, all the scheduling for the girls, afternoon help with the girls, all the purchasing for girls (e.g., clothes, shoes, anything they need for school, friends' birthdays, etc).  I am missing my partner in crime around this place!

(*I should note that the girls do a lot around the house, too.  Thankfully they are also helping pick up some of the work, too.  The more stressed I get, the more they help.)

 I've written about MWH in the past...
  http://3littlegirls-ohmy.blogspot.com/2006/06/happy-fathers-day.html
  http://3littlegirls-ohmy.blogspot.com/2011/06/happy-fathers-day.html

Monday, January 02, 2017

Am I back?

For the moment... who knows how long--no promises it will last any longer than today.  This blog is a good place to put things that I want to remember but don't want to put on either of my other 3 blogs... YES, 3! (Home, food, and work...)

Goals for the year


  • Eat more sriracha
  • Take more walks and have more talks
  • Go to the middle school and run around on the track (this one is so far away from what we do now that if we did this one or two times this year I would consider it a win.)
  • Write more for my blog at work
  • Find more yummy recipes
  • Continue eating well, working out a lot (5-6 times a week), tap dancing


Break Highlights


  • Having a great talk with the girls about the work I do
  • Actually getting holiday cards mailed
  • Hanging out and having down time
  • Getting most of my "list" of things to do for work done without too much stress



Thursday, December 29, 2016

Movies

Movies we watched over Christmas Break 2016
Finding Dory
Singin' in the Rain (before Debbie Reynolds died)
Secret life of pets
War games (yes the 1980s one)
Miss Peregrine's home for peculiar children
Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure


Rogue One  (excellent but I remembered how much I hate going to the movies.  We had to sit over an hour before the 2 hour and 13 minute movie... 1/2 hour early for decent seats and then more than 1/2 hour of ads/trailers.)

Potential movies to watch
Gremlins
Goonies
Major League (recommended by a friend--I haven't seen it.)
Pink Panther Movies

Forrest Gump
Moana (as soon as it's out on Netflix / iTunes) 
Hidden Figures (as soon as it's out on Netflix / iTunes)

Movies we've watched
Big (a little uncomfortablee on the love scenes)
Stand by me
ET
Men in Black (only the 14 year old liked it)
Back to the Future (all of them loved all 3)
Ferris Bueller's Day Off

Princess Bride

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

One of our kitties...

On Halloween, one of our beautiful black kitties was diagnosed with intestinal lymphoma.   We'll call him Tall Handsome Boy or THB for short.  Here's what I shared with a friend in FB.  This blog may be resurrected after all... look, 2 posts in a as many days!  I want to remember some things and I don't want to put them on my other blogs.

THB has intestinal lymphoma (the slow growing kind)... Apparently it's really common in cats. He's going to be on prednisone 2x a day and chlorambucil (low dose) 3 x a week for a long time (up to two years). So far, it's been 2 months of treatment. After the first month and 1 week we got good blood results. We go back in another couple of weeks and have another blood draw. The good news is we don't have to take THB in and we give him the pills at home.  He doesn't hate them too much.  I've known some cats who HATE pills and the treatment would be awful for them.


In addition, THB seems to be tolerating the meds e.g., no throwing up and eating pretty well. His energy is about 85-95% of normal on most days. Today he seems pretty perky and I'd put him at 95%. (Last week we had a day when he was really draggy and I was worried, but he bounced back the next day.) I'm hoping that as the treatment goes on we'll have less low energy days. I can't complain though 'cause the really draggy days haven't been very frequent and I think (and hope) we are on positive trend for his energy and eating.

Monday, December 26, 2016

Thoughts as the girls get older...

Friend:
            We are winding down for the day. Mom and dad are exhausted. How have you survived with 3?? 

Anyway hope you had a merry Christmas. 


Me:
            When the youngest hits 3 it gets easier. And we are still having a blast with them.

            Teenage years are significantly better than toddler years.  I have the best book recommendation. It's called "untangled" it's about girls growing up. I highly recommend it.

Friend:
            Well about 2 more years until we all are three and over... which will coincide with the milestone I'm really looking forward to.... no more diapers!


Me:
            No more diapers was HUGE.  The good news for us was that T (#3) potty trained herself ‘cause she was all about being a big kid!

Friend:
            I dislike nothing more than diapers and car seats. Ugh. 

Me:
            At some point they all strap themselves in the car seat.
            When I look back, I don’t even know how I got all 3 dressed, all their stuff for the day, and them into the car ….
            CRAZY


Friend:
            It is an act of god when we make it out of the house. 


Me:
            now I just say, we’re leaving in 5 minutes and you need a water bottle, snacks, and whatever you want to do to amuse yourself.
            It’s awesome
            (Been saying this probably since T (youngest) was probably 5… The youngest learns so much the older ones.)


Friend:
            Oh yeah. For sure. 

Me:
            Back when T was in kinder, she had to remember her hw, her kinder bag all by herself ‘cause I couldn’t remember any of it… I did so much for N (oldest).
            T is very responsible.
            N is too now, but I still do more for her than the others…. just ‘cause she’s the oldest
            and her personality… she likes to work with me
            She just wrote an essay for To Kill a Mockingbird and she wanted to have nightly chats about it.  It was super fun and sweet.
            (She = N for To Kill a mockingbird)

Friend:
            We do a ton for S (#1) as well. She does not like doing much by her self. 

L (#2) on the other hand enjoys her alone time. 
            Super fun. Can't wait. 

Me:
            K (#2) is so independent
            She likes her alone time too… and with her, she won’t let me help on her homework… AT ALL… I tell her if she gets As, I won’t intervene… If she ever falls lower than that, she gets to sit with me and work with me

            It totally motivates her.  This year, we had to intervene with Algebra 1….  She was getting a …. She pulled it up to a by the end of the trimester… She *almost* got an .

Saturday, March 19, 2016

Quarterly check in

The girls are good.  Three-a is going to middle school in the fall, twoK is in middle school right now (and struggling with math... not because she doesn't understand it, but because she doesn't like it). oNe is going to high school in the fall.  

When you get to high school, the focus is on getting in to college.  There are many people in our area who have a specific college in mind for their kid (or several very high ranking specific ones). I don't understand that.  Of course,  I want my kids to have a good life. But I think the college they choose should be up to them and they shouldn't feel pressured to go to a certain school.  (Of course, if they've heard their whole lives that they have to go to a certain school, or a certain kind of school to have a certain kind of life, they will "want" to go to those schools.) 

We know what goals oNe has and I have shared several schools with her that we know she can get in and that would be a good fit for her.  I'm sure she'll end up with some on the list and some different ones by the time the deadline gets here, but we're not going to stress about it.  We will keep talking and let her be in the driver's seat.  (I know there are some kids who need more guidance, but I would encourage them to figure out what they want instead of figuring out what I want for them, but that's just me.)

Recently, NYTimes Well Family blog had a post about college and it's very enlightening.  One tip that I learned is that we'll submit early (do it over the summer!). Other things from the article: We will make sure that for each kid, we'll know what they want from a school. We'll make sure we are doing some more community service... We are lacking in that department.  It's a good reminder for us.  We won't take every advanced course.  (oNe could have taken the SUPER-DUPER advanced math course in her freshman year, but she opted not to take it.  It is fine.  I know parents who wouldn't have allowed that transgression to occur.)

I love the spreadsheet tip and the "get a job" in the summer tip so that you can learn from diverse situations.  Each summer, I look for opportunities for the girls to be mother's helpers (as the girls are still young).  This summer, oNe will take the baby sitting course and get certified.  She already kind of has a job (taking care of animals); I wish twoK could take the course at age 12, but she can't until she is 13.  oNe going to college and twoK going to college will be two very different experiences.  Three-a will make it three different experiences. Oh, wow!  If you'd have told me 10 years ago that I'd be thinking about colleges now, I would have said, yea, whatevs.  Even 2 years ago, I wouldn't have believed you. It goes so fast!




Sunday, January 03, 2016

A good reminder


Happy New Year!

I'm still here.

Only 3-ish months this time.

I'm thinking resolutions, but I don't like to call them that.  Goals, that's a better word.

More strength training classes:
I ALWAYS get in one a week.  I usually get in two a week, and I sometimes get in 3 a week.  I'd like to more consistently do 3 a week.  If I can't get in 3 a week, I should do more core work at home (at the very least).

More flexibility work:
I'd like to do yoga, but I haven't found a class that works for my schedule and body.  I have some stretches I love so maybe I just need to work on my own and do the poses I think work well for me.

More fun:
I need to make a goal to not work between 5 pm and 10 pm (except if I'm teaching and that's only one night a week).  To hang with the girls... to play with them.

This Christmas, they got a jumprope, the kind that takes two people twirling... I like to jumprope, and it's fun to hang with them.  Try to do this with them once a week, if possible.  (Or stretch with twoK... she loves to stretch.)  (oNe and I take 2 dance classes together so we do get some quality fun time.)

With MWH, we need to try to do date nights / afternoons more often (and actually go out just the two of us).

Blogwise:
Maybe I should try to blog at least monthly here?  I'm trying to blog a lot on the family picture blog.  I'm thinking about doing a good photo of the week... Maybe I should do photo of the month?

Food-wise, I'm always just working to find EASY, tasty, healthy, FAST recipes.   I have a food blog were I keep all the recipes we use.  We eat pretty darn well.  3 of us are vegans and 2 of us are vegetarians.  We try to eat as many (green) plants as possible!

Just FYI, January is going to be a crazy month with work--if I can't do it all in January, it's okay.  February is my birthday month so it's like a new year and I can start then!  (Wish me luck on all that we have to do in January.)

__________

In other news, oNe is going to be 14 soon!!! OMG.  So far, she's the sweetest teen you've ever met.  She doesn't want to be a rotten teen.  She looks at friends who have become "teenagers" and she really hopes it doesn't happen to her.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

reminiscing

A text chat with a friend... She's pregnant and lots of questions.  I tried my best to remember.

Interviewer: 
            was oNe the pregnancy where you liked caffeine?
Me: 
            I didn't like it or dislike it; I tried not to drink it
            ‘cause I’d had a miscarriage
            but then around week 15 or 16 I had some and MWH said, NEVER give it up again.

Interviewer: 
            Hahaha

Me: 
            He said I was so unlike myself.
            I couldn’t drink it at the end though ‘cause it gave me really bad heartburn with N
            I googled “can you die of heartburn.”
Me: 
            you can’t….
            you just might want to
Interviewer:  

            It feels like you can

Interviewer: 
            You mentioned that during one of your pregnancies if it wasn't caffeinated you weren't interested.

Me: 
            yup
            With twoK, she didn’t like caffeine
            at all.
            but I did drink a little tea… Chai teas.
            from Starbucks.
            she loved SOY.  She LOVED miso soup
            (Chai with soy)
Interviewer: 
            I really like lemony iced teas 
Me: 
            (she loved soy steamers with vanilla)
            😊
Interviewer: 
            Haha! I bet!
Me: 
            Three-a loved everything except citrus
            I still don’t like citrus
            I like lemons and limes now
            but I hate oranges/tangerines/etc.
Interviewer: 
            Did you like them before Three-a?
Me: 
             yes. But now the thought of citrus can still send me over the edge. She likes citrus.
Interviewer: 
            Haha. That's so wild!
Me: 
            I nearly lost it after eating a tangerine with her
            we called her Tangerine Pie in utero
Interviewer: 
            Awwww
Me: 
            or SUUUUUURPRISE (that's what we called her a lot)


I start posts sometimes

And don't finish them.

(HA... I wrote this in March.)

Start of the school year

I just found this (written in August).

At the moment, girls are good. I am worried that 8th grade is going to be difficult for oNe emotionally 'cause she doesn't have friends in her classes. I'm hopeful that she has grown since 6th and it won't be as bad.

We will be agonizing over this most of the year, I fear.

twoK got into a very advanced level in ballet at a studio far from our house. She really wants to do it. She's starting middle school and has all of the emotional stuff going on there, and is working very hard in her dance. I love dance, but sometimes it can make you feel less than confident. She struggles with that. I hope this opportunity help her grow.

Three-a, she's super confident, has three really wonderful friends, they are all in the same fifth-grade class, and is very enthusiastic about almost everything. I guess that's not true, but everything she pursues, she pursues with A smile all the time, it seems. When she is sad or upset it is shocking.

(The good news is so far, 8th hasn't been that bad.)

(2 posts in one day... who'd have thought!?)