Friday, March 21, 2008

eyelashes

Did I ever tell you my eyelashes are going gray? (Here's a handy-dandy table for US versus UK spellings. Grey and gray always confuse me... I can never remember what we Americans prefer. I think it's because of greyhound.)

Anyway, my eyelashes are going gray. I get them tinted because my eyes are very dry and I can't wear mascara. Boy, I sound high maintenance, but really, I'm not THAT high maintenance. I am probably in the middle of the road on that one too.... just like organization. As another sidenote, I HIGHLY recommend Omega 3s and Flax Seed Oil if you have dry eyes, and Refresh Endura is great.

What was the point... I don't remember. Oh yea.... I changed my status at work. I am now a total part-timer! I think it's going to be good for me. I'm very tired. Very very very tired. I've been working a lot and working in many different directions for a while. I've told you about my teeth annoying me when I'm stressed, but lately, it's EVEN worse than usual. My jaw has been in a permanent clench for weeks now. I'm so tired of being tired and stressed. I'm hoping the status change will help me a lot. (Maybe it will even help me have less gray? Maybe it will slow down the graying process?)

I knew this status change was coming. It's been coming for a while now. I was amazed I held out as long as I did. It's okay. I will most likely go back to working more in a few years. In the mean time, I should enjoy the little girls and do only the projects that are rewarding and are worth taking time away from the little girls. I say this to convince myself it's okay to work less. I want to work less because I want to spend time with the girls... I don't want to work less because I LIKE what I do (usually) and I feel like I'm a loser who can't "do it all." If any of my friends told me they were going to work less to make their life more sane, I'd say, "Good for you! That's great!" So why can't I say the same thing to myself?

My wise friend Nino told me....

Treat yourself as you would one of your girls if they were hurt/confused/sad/etc. Do what comforts you. Speak kindly to yourself. Do good things for your body (go get a massage, take an extra long nap, get a mani/pedi or take in a nice restorative yoga class).

I'm convinced being unkind and impatient with myself has been the greatest cause of grief in most of the challenging situations in my life.



I'm trying. She explained how she often "bullied" herself. I do the same thing. I am not very nice to myself in my head. I should get over it.

Anyway... It's the start of the weekend. I'm hoping to get in some R&R. I'll report back.

2 comments:

PS said...

I think it's great that you're taking more time for yourself. I hope to follow your example in the not too-distant future :)

Anonymous said...

Yay, it's official! I'm thrilled for you. I think you're going to love this slower pace once you get used to it. It takes a little while. I remember the feeling well. That shifting gears thing. That feeling like a loser thing. I don't know that feeling anymore. But I was horrible to myself about it. Then I got over it. lol