Tuesday, January 03, 2006

One more...

One more resolution. I know some people don't like resolutions, but I do. I don't make a resolution if I don't feel I am able to keep it. (Why bother if you know you can't do it???) I don't make resolutions like exercise more or lose weight because I will do those things as soon as I can. (Remember, I'm one of those people who like to exercise. I like to go to the gym. I like to do a kick-boxing and then aerobics class back to back. I have a heart rate monitor and I use it. Exercise is fun in my opinion.)

My additional resolution is to be more patient with N. N is almost 4, and sometimes acts like she's going on 14 and sometimes acts like she's 19 months old (like K). Both drive me crazy. N's father is so patient with her. I am not always so patient. I end up being very frustrated and sometimes yelling to get her attention. I get so mad at myself when I react that way. I feel awful. I need to count to 10 more and not react.

I did better yesterday. Yesterday she was very tired when she came home from preschool. (Not surprising as it was her first day back after 2 weeks off.) We were in the car driving home and she said she wanted to go to the post office to mail a card to Grandma and Grandpa... Okay, that's fine (sweet even)... I said we could go. She showed me her "card and envelope" that she had created. I try and explain to her that the envelope she has made won't actually make it to Grandma and Grandpa if she mails it like it is. I try to explain addresses and such to her. She starts to cry. I pause and try to think of something different to say, but wait, two seconds have passed and she is hysterical. Good times.

Deep breath. Count to 10. Remember she is tired. Try to explain again. She's still hysterical. I am frustrated because she is screaming and won't look or listen to me. I think she's being a little irrational, but I am trying to not be upset. I get out of the car (we're at home in the garage now). She's still screaming. I shut the door and count to 10. She's still screaming. I tell her she needs to calm down. Still screaming. I shut the door of the car. I take my purse in the house. I go back and check on her. She is still screaming unconsolably. I tell her that she can stay in the car for a few more minutes. Shut the door to the car. Count to 10. Listen to her scream louder. Know that I can't take her out of the car because she'll wake up both of her little sisters who are inside napping. I ask the nanny if she has any suggestions. The nanny doesn't.

Go back to the garage. Count to 10 again. Open the door. Listen to her howl about wanting to go to the post office to mail the letter. I try and explain that we need a different envelope to put her card and evelope in. Listen to her howl. Shut door.... Count. Rinse. Repeat. I decide to show her what an envelope that meets postal regulations looks like. Feel like a genius. Run inside and get one. Address it and stick a stamp on it. Go back to the car. Show it to her. Watch her cry harder. Sigh. Count again.

Ask her what we can do to make her happy. Have her tell you again that she wants to mail the envelope as is. Tell her if we mail it as is, it won't get to Grandma & Grandpa. Have her cry. Have her beg to go the Post Office. Decide to drive to the post office and see if one of the postal employees can explain things to her. Hope that they don't go postal on her. Start the car. Have her scream that the post office is at the end of our drive way. Realize she thinks our mailbox is the post office. Realize that she can stick the card and envelope in the mailbox as is and that I can pull it out. Tell her we can walk to the mailbox. Have her stop crying. Thank you! I take a deep breath and decide to explain the difference between a mailbox and post office. She is now starting to listen. She's calming down and becoming a somewhat rational being. I'm a parenting genius! (Tongue in cheek.)

After learning the difference between the post office and the mailbox she decides that it might be better to wait and take the "card and envelope" to the post office. But before we do that she wants to make some more things to send to Grandma & Grandpa. She also decides that we can use the real envelope to hold all of her creations. Whew.... All of this takes about 10-15 minutes. That doesn't sound very long, but when a child is screaming it's a really long time.

And that is why my additional resolution is to try and be more patient with N.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

It seems to me you WERE patient--I know it didn't feel like it, but you were!
Isn't it funny how often we say no before we realize what it is they really want? I do that all the time.
Stamps are stickers, you know!