Things I shouldn't be stressing about

but of course, I am.

1. I have to go to BIG CITY far away for work. I don't want to go. I dislike traveling. It's in a week (I'll leave 5/3 and be back 5/6, so it's not that big of a trip... I'll get to see some family too. I should make the best of it, but every time I think about it I get a sick feeling in my stomach.) One trip is bad, but it worked out that I actually have two trips in the same week for work... I go on 5/1-5/2 for one and then leave again on 5/3. Bleh, bleh, bleh.

2. twoK's birthday party is scheduled and the invitations have been sent. I invited WAY more children than the place allows and I'm a little concerned about everyone saying they'll come, and that the place won't let people in, and that it will be awful. I shouldn't worry about this until it becomes an issue, eh?

3. Another work project. I just can't get my head around it. Every week, at the Friday meeting, I feel completely stupid. I don't feel like I'm contributing in any positive ways. I know I have in the past, but right now, I'm overwhelmed. It's only been two meetings that I've felt this way, so in the big scheme, it's okay, but I really dislike this feeling. I need to spend time with it this weekend so I can really think about what we're doing. Ugh.

4. As the girls get bigger, I want to be around more. I don't know how I can keep working and spend as much time as I want to spend with them. It seems I'm always having to either miss out on their stuff or that I'm feeling behind and overwhelmed at work. I don't like this. Again, in the grand scheme of things, I am lucky and really shouldn't be complaining. I only work half-time. I think, that as Three-a gets into school, specifically in first grade, things will be a little better, e.g., more organized, but that's still 1.5 years away. Yikes. And then, I'll still want to be around a lot. Maybe I should work very, very part-time so I can not feel so guilty about everything, but even if I only worked very, very part-time, I'm sure things would still conflict and things would end up crazy and I'd feel torn in two directions.

Okay... ending this pity party post.