In many movies, when the protagonist is facing a difficult situation, it often starts raining on them to accentuate the despair. That's how I feel today. It's not an awful day, but I'm tired and overwhelmed. And it really is raining here today. Figuratively it's raining because I'm having an issue with one of the nannies. I don't feel comfortable writing it up and leaving it on the blog, so I'm not going to post it here. We have known her for 4 years and we do love her. However, her heart is not in being a nanny anymore and ...
Anyway... I talked with her today and it always stresses me out to do that. It doesn't seem to bother her in the slightest, and that's fine, but it does show me how ready she is to move on, and that's fine.... It's just complicated and I'm far more into it than I wanted to go, so this post might come down, or get revised, or something. We'll see.
What else.... Because of the above, I feel I didn't do my best on a project at work. This bums me out. I also just feel overwhelmed by the fact that when you're a Mom, you don't ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever get a vacation. Even if someone took my kids and took great care of them, it wouldn't be a vacation. I want to take care of my kids. I want to work. I want to do it all. I also want to be a good wife and it seems like there just isn't enough of me to go around....
I'm sure if you're reading this blog you understand.
Today started off well enough. I got something done for work and emailed off. Then I even made a couple of web pages for our family. Then the day spun out of control.
Most of the time I feel like I am doing okay in keeping things decently in balance, but every once in a while it all just overtakes me and I feel like I'm drowning. That's today. Perhaps I didn't have enough caffeine. Perhaps it's just the rain. I'm sure I'll feel better tomorrow. I sure hope so. I'm just overwhelmed.
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