I have a person in my life who doesn't seem to have much empathy. Actually she does have a lot of empathy for some things, but not for things in my life and this pisses me off. It really makes me not want her in my life at all. I realize the things I discuss with her are completely out of her control, but she is defensive or dismissive and not empathetic. She is younger than me so I want to share with her how important empathy is, but if I do, she will most likely get defensive. I hope that someone else can share with her how important empathy is.
I haven't read the "Men are from Mars..." book, but other people have summarized it for me. One difference that I've been told is cited in the book is that when a complaint or issue is raised, men and women have different reactions. Men usually start trying to "fix" things and women usually empathize. Most of the time, women want that empathy and that is why it is easier for women to be friends with other women and men with other men. Perhaps if this person was a man, I wouldn't object to her behavior, but because she is a woman, and because I know she is capable of empathizing and showing great caring and understanding in certain domains, I have such a negative visceral reaction to her lack of empathy.
Whenever I have a bad interaction with her, I try my hardest to not get upset. From talking with her, I know she never thinks twice about our interactions, and that's part of the problem too.
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